Dennis Blogged My Wedding!

I look at Dennis's blog everyday.  It's one of life's pleasures.  Also it helps me keep track of whether or not he's in my time zone.  Recently, I've been looking at it everyday, thinking, "maybe today is the day that Dennis blogged my wedding." Generally, it turns out to be the day he ate a fried chicken dinner or drank Smileywine with a model.  But not today!

Dennis blogged my wedding!

With an appropriate emphasis on mashed potato martinis.

Also this picture cracks me up.  Look at Grace there, insisting on being on the picture but unwilling to stop playing with her Barbies.  Love.

Whoa 80s

With Chelsea Clinton's wedding on the horizon, mass media outlets have begun a thoroughly entertaining trip down Memory Lane: Political Children's Edition, featuring Maria Shriver and Ahnuld:



Helloooooo leg o' mutton sleeves.

Restaurant Quality Pastaaaa

I made some awesome pasta last night. Ordinarily when I make a screamingly awesome dish but forget to take photos I don't bother putting it on the blog, but this was so great that I think you should know about it even though I forgot to take pictures. So. Dinner for two, as follows.

First, chop up a head of cauliflower and heat up a glug of olive oil in a big saute pan. No wait. FIRST put on a big pot of salted water to boil. THEN chop up a head of cauliflower and heat up a glug of olive oil in a big saute pan. When the oil is screaming hot, dump in half the cauliflower and let it get super brown. (Secret to this: don't touch it for a while; then once it's brown on the bottom, give the pan an occasional shake). Shower with salt and pepper. Then remove the cauliflower and repeat with the other half - if you try to do all the cauliflower at once, you will have a soggy mess.

While you're allowing your cauliflower to get deliciously caramelized, chop up and combine: eight to ten cloves of garlic, the last of the garlic scapes you bought last week and have been adding to everything willy-nilly (optional), a dash of red pepper flakes, and large amounts (a tablespoon each?) of toasted ground fenugreek and coriander seed (I toasted the whole spices in a dry pan over high heat for like a minute, and then ground them in my mortar and pestle. If you are a plebeian who doesn't keep an assortment of whole exotic spices on hand to toast and grind at your leisure, just use something pungent, although I would say not cumin. Curry might be nice).

Once all your second batch of cauliflower is brown, turn off the heat and your attention to the pasta. Hopefully, your water is boiling, so dump in your half-pound of pasta (something short; I used linguine broken into thirds) and cook for the suggested amount of time. Once the pasta is about two minutes from being done, turn the heat under your cauliflower pan back on, return the first half that you browned back in the pan, and add your SPICE MIXTURE. Also add a giant glug of Worcestershire sauce. I know, so tacky, but: trust me. Mix all of this around and try not to faint. Hear your husband returning to the apartment from his wine run and smile as he makes complimentary comments about the apartment's incredible new smell. Then, using a ladle or measuring cup, add about a cup of the pasta cooking water to your cauliflower and let it all simmer down. Then add your cooked pasta and let it cook for about one more minute. Shower with Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese. Spoon into bowls. Eat. Love.

If you have extra people around, just use more pasta. You can leave the cauliflower/spice amounts as is.

We Bought a Table

Isn't my life the most fascinating thing ever?  Here's today's humdinger: Dan and I just bought a table for our living/dining room.  Merry Christmas, baby!  Once we buy chairs to go with it, in probably another seven months, we can finally have more than one person over for dinner.

Okay, some better stuff.  We went to Red's annual Beach House Bash over the weekend and I decided to look as simultaneously dorky and all-powerful as possible.

This year I learned that Red's family rents the house to Fairfield students during the school year, which blew my mind.  Could you imagine being a college junior/senior and living on the beach?  My liver hurts just thinking about it.  Anyway, it was a smaller crowd this year and that actually made it even nicer.  So fun.  Thanks, Red!

Awwwww

At one point, our kitties were little handfuls of fluff.

Nine Items or Less

So I was thinking about doing it, and then talking about thinking about doing it, and then decided I should probably just do it.  So for the next month, until August 26th, I'm doing it.  The six items or less challenge.

However, six items is kind of crazy.  So I'm doing nine items.  I chose a pair of black jeans, some jorts, two tank tops, one t-shirt, two dresses, and two more items to be determined later (reserve items for when I want to quit).  I plotted out laundry logistics, and I think it's gonna work.  Workout clothes, bathing suits, and undies don't count.

I am doing this because:

You know what?  Eh.  I don't feel like telling you why.  But I'll let you know how it goes.

World Back On Track

You guys!

Brad Pitt is hot again!

Six Items Or Less

Interesting article today about a web-based challenge called "Six Items or Less."  The participants all pledged, for one month, to limit their wardrobe to no more than six pieces of clothing.  Apparently, the biggest lesson they all learned: no one noticed.

I'm pretty sure that Dan has been participating in the "challenge" unknowingly since high school, but it's pretty intriguing to me...  

Eeeeeee

My time on it has come and gone, but I still stalk my wedding photographer's blog for old time's sake, and recently stumbled upon this shot:

source

What?! This isn't from a bridal magazine.  Those are real people!  I know; I didn't believe it either.  It looks like the cover for a direct-to-DVD sequel to The Princess Bride or something.  (I mean that in a good way).


WAIT, did I never put up my photographer's teaser pictures?  Holy shit, I did not.  Visit her blog for them all, but in case you're lazy, some samples: 

People Making Amusing Faces At Our Wedding

*****note: blog layout has been changed so I can post larger pictures.  I am so savvy.

I should be getting our pro pics (that's bridespeak for professional photos) from our wedding in the next two weeks or so... but in the meantime, I think it's worth pointing out all of the great photos that Scotty got that day.  Particularly the ones in which none of us are making our "camera face."  Without further ado... people making amusing faces at our wedding!

Scotty: this is as close to a bad picture as I get!  Haha!

Ed. note: (it's true.  It sucks).

Gaby learns the perils of high heels.

Babcia: I am just standing here.  I am old, okay?  Evonne and Richard are just casually standing there on either side of me at a healthy distance, but I'm pretty sure they're ready to spring into action if I fall.

Red: Everything's great!  I have two drinks in front of me!
Holly: Everyone at our wedding will start with two drinks.

Meanwhile, Jami and Jenny wonder where the F Red got his extra drinks.

ck begins his rounds of Dances with Married Women with my Aunt Cindy.  Please note that Aunt Cindy danced so hard at my wedding that she tore her miniscus.  She swears it was worth it, but I'm sorry AC!

I figure if I'm going to post about Aunt Cindy getting down ad nauseum, I should throw in a good one of Uncle Jim.

Mom and Scott reflect on the years of their life that wedding planning has shaved away.

Matt.  Oh, Matt.  (Note Cindy and Jim in back, skipping the intermezzo to continue dancing).

Matt attempts to prevent Megan from participating in the bouquet toss.

Mei and Bri, celebrating a rare twinless night.  They booked their sitter the day they got their save-the-date.

ck, having made the full rounds of every one of her friends, sets his sights on my mom.

Aunt Mary and I yell at one another about the brewing scandal re: Mom and ck.  Aunt Mary is outraged.  I think it's cool.

(that's a joke.  I don't know what we're doing.  Besides, ck and my mom are now very happy.  Ohhhh my lord, I'm KIDDING people, I'm kidding!!!).

Katie notices an imperfection somewhere that has no chance against her powers of Fixing Everything.

The mother of the groom displays lizard-like concentration on Dan's new wedding ring.

DJ Frank F: Seriously, if I play the YMCA, they're sending me home.

I'm guessing that in this shot, Biz has learned that Emily, behind her, is a mother of two.  What?!

Kate can't believe it either.

The news has a profound effect on Mom & friends.

Rini shushes someone making marriage jokes to her boyfriend.  I just noticed all the high heels piled on their table.  Ha!

John: What?  You want me to play something?  Oh, I don't know, I guess I could play any and all songs you want for the next hour or so...

Matt makes use of the props I bought for the photobooth that never happened.  Thanks, Matt!  (Below the frame: Matt's spectacular style statement of shorts, dress shoes, and tuxedo socks to go with his sombrero).

Biz, her drink now empty, tries to convince Jami she's 21.  Jami: knows better.

But the best face of the day belongs hands-down to my nephew Jake.  He doesn't always look like Ed Asner, but for whatever reason, the sun brings it out in him.  Baby in a suit!

The Most Dramatic Rose Ceremony Ever

I've been very into The Bachelorette this season.  I don't usually watch, but my boss loves it, and I figured it would at least have some good travel porn.  It does (they go to California, New York, Iceland, Istanbulturkey, and Lisbonportugal!).  Also it's hilarious.  Here's the bachelorette herself, awkwardly making conversation with Frontrunner Frank:



and here she is with Other Frontrunner Roberto, who she clearly wants to bone.  Like if this show were on at 10 they would've already hit the Fantasy Suite.



I was discussing the contestants with Dennis, who I think got it dead-on that Ali must choose Frank, by her own will or through the machinations of a skillful producer, because Roberto is destined to become the next Bachelor (I guess she could pick Chris L., but I refer to him as "The Boring One" so: meh).  He's so right.  Roberto is a former professional baseball player!  Can you imagine the puns?  The disastrous first group date at the batting cage?  The girls all competing to sit in his dugout???  (Ew).

Then my boss and I were discussing Frank and how he's all weird when I realized that he is NOT acting weird.  He's acting insecure and paranoid that everything around him is fake, which is annoying to watch, but not really weird at all when you consider:

-everything around him IS fake
-it's kind of normal to question a girl's sincerity when she's dating eleven other guys

So perhaps Frank's tics are just him listening to his instincts as a person.  All the promos for next week (which is in TAHITI, HELLO) show him whispering "we need to talk" and Ali crying.  I can't wait.

UPDATE: True Blood: New Hotness: Video

I decided that pictures were inadequate.  I can't believe how fickle I am.  I am so totally over Eric.

True Blood: New Hotness

Dan commented last night that True Blood only cares about its lady viewers.  And gays.  Considering the main new addition to the cast, I think he's right:

Eric who?

As usual, when the terribly-named "Alcide" took his shirt off, we busted out laughing.  Does EVERYONE in the American south have titanium abs?  Is there something in biscuits and gravy that I'm not aware of?

I unfortunately can't find a screenshot of him bare-torsoed with wolf hair, so we'll have to make do with his abshot:

And his armshot:

and another headshot for good measure (Denny sent me this one... apparently Alcide is a client of his mentor, Bjoern).



Wait, Alcide knows Bjoern... and Bjoern knows Dennis... and Dennis knows ME... oh wait I'm married.

And all Dan gets is 2 seconds of Anna Paquin in her underwear.  Poor Dan.