Leaning In

A lot's being made of the differences between Sheryl Sandberg (Lean In) and Anne-Marie Slaughter (Why Women Still Can't Have It All) when it comes to their theories on why so few women are leaders. Sandberg focuses on internal barriers, Slaughter on external. Both are criticized for focusing on privileged women in already-high positions. Both, in my opinion, are pretty bad ass, and I think pretending the two are at odds is ridiculous. They go out of their way to compliment each other, and not in a disingenuous frenemy way. We need both of their arguments to change things, and they know it.

Personally, Sandberg's TED talk exploded across the internet at a critical time for me. A promotion had just opened up at work, and I felt poorly positioned to get it. I was competing with another guy on my team who had been their longer, and who had better connections across the company. I started telling myself that it would be okay if I didn't get it. I didn't want it. I had just been married, and wanted to have kids at some point. Dan could make the money. No big deal. 

Well, Sheryl had apparently been sitting in my brain, listening, and in fifteen minutes, completely changed my mind. Dan would NOT make all the money; it was NOT okay for me to lean back, and it was NOT "not a big deal" if the promotion went to someone else: I was going to work my ass off and get that job.

So I did, and it worked. Aside from the obvious benefits - more money, business cards (you have no idea how much I wanted those damn business cards), and a full twelve extra inches of desk space, it gave me the confidence to raise my profile in the company, speak up in those big meetings, and even challenge the status quo. It made me better. And if I, who grew up being told over and over and over that I could do anything, that ladies are equal to or better than men, and being in general a highly confident, thoroughly educated overachiever - if I needed that kick in the pants, then what of everyone else?

I started reading Lean In last night and can already tell I'll be returning to it time and again for inspiration, as well as giving it to every recent lady grad I know. I'll write about it in more detail once I'm done. 

View From My New Office At Night

I guess the downside of moving on up and getting a great view is that you'll look at the nighttime version of it a lot.

I'm actually still at the office because I'm meeting Smashley tonight and there's no point in going home first. And whatever! It's a pretty sick nighttime view!