New York Problems

Dan and I rarely order delivery. "Oh, it's because I like to cook, and cooking is so much healthier anyways," I used to tell myself. But tonight, after yet another fight on the phone with a restaurant on Seamless (isn't the whole point of Seamless to eliminate conversations with a heavily accented guy at the local sushi place?), I realized that between eighty and ninety percent of the time that I've ordered delivery, the guy can't locate our extremely easy-to-find apartment, or just hangs out on the stoop, refusing to knock.

I'd be more self-aware about how bratty this sounds, but it's 9:47 and I haven't had dinner.

From This Week's GOOP, Presented Without Comment

"For lounging around on the weekend, we opt for loose silk pants and a plain sweatshirt."

Sweatshirt: $675

Jewelry (combined): $790

"Sneakers": $600

Pants: $1,695

"Lounging around on the weekend" total: $3,760 (excluding blowout)

Blergh

I generally respect my elders, but sometimes you have to remember that our elders decided to tear down the old Penn Station. Those particular elders were idiots.

If non-New Yorkers need a point of comparison for the new Penn Station, close your eyes. That empty blackness is a decent approximation.

Dammit

It's St. Patrick's Day and YET AGAIN I forgot to learn the Irish accordion.

On Mortality and Privilege While Skiing in the Rockies

I learned to ski when I was 10. A family friend took me for the day to Vernon Valley/Great Gorge in New Jersey, and I learned the pizza wedge in an all-day lesson. A few years later, I started going on school trips, and eventually - this is where I really lucked out - to places like Utah, Vancouver, and Tahoe with my aunt. I've never been much of an athlete, but I picked up skiing quickly. By the end of my two years in LA, where the combination of no time commitments whatsoever and similarly self-scheduled friends in San Francisco and Vail meant multiple trips to Tahoe and the Rockies each season, I was pretty damn good. Since then, my skiing has been sporadic. What sport has more obstacles? It can be practiced only in certain, highly specific areas, requiring a serious cache of gear. It demands planning and cash.

Before I started my new job, I spent a few days Beaver Creek skiing with college buddies. It was awesome. I caught up with close friends I don't see often. Yaf, our host, has been skiing BC for years and pointed us toward all the best runs. We zoomed down the mountain and then chatted on the chairlift. It started with general catching up, but quickly turned to the fact that WE ARE GETTING OLD.

You guys. My knees. I used to be able to bomb down a mogul run, trusting that even if I was in terrible shape and possibly not skilled enough to navigate all the bumps, I could depend on fearlessness and a force of will to get down. Now I get winded halfway through, and plot out ways to unlock my screaming calves. I said the following phrase: "My knees!" - more than once. The post-ski hot tub morphed from fun drinking location to a physical necessity.

I was not alone in this.

The phrase "I'm so lucky" went through my head frequently as well. First, just to be there. To be someplace so beautiful and fun, with great friends. Also: to have access to a sport like this; that I'm able to buy a plane ticket and a three-day mountain pass without thinking too much about, is an incredible privilege. I actually have a lot more to say about that, but every time I try to phrase it I come out sounding like an asshole. Because writing a whole post about skiing a mountain whose actual, unironic slogan is "Beaver Creek: Not exactly roughing it" didn't do that already.

So to complete the picture, here's a photo of us chowing down on the warm chocolate chip cookies that staffers in chef hats and coats reading "Cookie Time!" pass out at the end of the day. Because if they weren't warm... that would probably be roughing it.

PULL

Over dinner, Dan and Melanie and Willis and I made impromptu, slightly drunk plans to get out of town for President's Weekend.

"We can go shooting!" Willis pointed out. And it was done.

We went up to Millbrook and rented a charming cottage that turned out to have no heat. OOPS.

Keeping Oscar warm became quite the priority. But it was fine - we bummed around the town, had some great meals, and then... WENT SHOOTING.

Look, I get it. The wood-paneled Orvis lodge had a fireplace, and it smelled of pine. There were approximately one quadrillion accessories available to supplement your participation in a "sport" that includes an optional golf cart rental. We had a great time. But I'm still of the opinion that no civilian on this earth needs to own a semi-automatic weapon.

Rainy Tuesday

Leaning In

A lot's being made of the differences between Sheryl Sandberg (Lean In) and Anne-Marie Slaughter (Why Women Still Can't Have It All) when it comes to their theories on why so few women are leaders. Sandberg focuses on internal barriers, Slaughter on external. Both are criticized for focusing on privileged women in already-high positions. Both, in my opinion, are pretty bad ass, and I think pretending the two are at odds is ridiculous. They go out of their way to compliment each other, and not in a disingenuous frenemy way. We need both of their arguments to change things, and they know it.

Personally, Sandberg's TED talk exploded across the internet at a critical time for me. A promotion had just opened up at work, and I felt poorly positioned to get it. I was competing with another guy on my team who had been their longer, and who had better connections across the company. I started telling myself that it would be okay if I didn't get it. I didn't want it. I had just been married, and wanted to have kids at some point. Dan could make the money. No big deal. 

Well, Sheryl had apparently been sitting in my brain, listening, and in fifteen minutes, completely changed my mind. Dan would NOT make all the money; it was NOT okay for me to lean back, and it was NOT "not a big deal" if the promotion went to someone else: I was going to work my ass off and get that job.

So I did, and it worked. Aside from the obvious benefits - more money, business cards (you have no idea how much I wanted those damn business cards), and a full twelve extra inches of desk space, it gave me the confidence to raise my profile in the company, speak up in those big meetings, and even challenge the status quo. It made me better. And if I, who grew up being told over and over and over that I could do anything, that ladies are equal to or better than men, and being in general a highly confident, thoroughly educated overachiever - if I needed that kick in the pants, then what of everyone else?

I started reading Lean In last night and can already tell I'll be returning to it time and again for inspiration, as well as giving it to every recent lady grad I know. I'll write about it in more detail once I'm done. 

Marnie is Singing Kanye West And I WANT TO DIEEEEEEE

View From My New Office At Night

I guess the downside of moving on up and getting a great view is that you'll look at the nighttime version of it a lot.

I'm actually still at the office because I'm meeting Smashley tonight and there's no point in going home first. And whatever! It's a pretty sick nighttime view!

View From My New Office

I feel like Melanie Griffith at the end of Working Girl.